Fester

Merry Christmas Eve. 

If only it was merry.

If only I could fill this hole. 

It's getting deeper and deeper every day

and I just want it to go away

but I know there's only one thing that could fix it.

Something that I've always wanted

but can never have. 

Not even a christmas wish can grant me this. 

So when you ask me "What's wrong?"

I'm not lying when I say I'm tired.

Because I am tired

Tired of this way I have to go through the day

Empty spaces inside. 

Rest In Peace Bobby Green.

This is so hard. I don't know what to do with myself. I miss you so much. My mind keeps running with my memory of you. It's as if you are still here. 

I love you so much Mr. Green. You have been the light of my life which lead me in the direction toward my passion. You taught me so much about life through music. I think i learned to live my life the way i do because of you. It hurts so much to know that you are not with us anymore. You were such a great friend, a mentor, and a genius. It is too unfair that you left us at such a young age. It makes me angry to think that choir will never be the same. I remember all those "Choir council meetings" that i went to. They were so much fun. Even though you bribed us to come with pizza. And i remember the silly games you made for us so we could all get to know each other more. Especially smugie or smoogi or whatever its called. The best game I have ever played. You were an angel in my life who inspired so many of my desires for my future. I remember all of the choir picnics and how excited you got for every little thing. I remember the time when we were talking about the meaning of the song we were singing in class and you accidentally made a dead grandma joke in front of a girl in our class who recently lost her grandma. I think about how terrible that was at the time and i look back and laugh. And i don't know why. I guess its because i remember how bad you felt afterwards. I remember when you always came to me to think of ideas for fun classroom stuff such as choir parties. I remember going to a holiday choir party, and only 7 people showed up, and you showed up, and we just played your favorite game- charades. And then when we played charades in the dunes... you gave drew song lyrics and he had to act out all of those tiny words and you really got a kick out of it. And then Jimmy had inglorious bastards. And i remember watching that video of you in high school singing with your a capella group. And then the video of you at a UofI game, and the camera zoomed on you while you were screaming "WERE NUMBER ONE! NUMBER ONNNNEEE" ... you would have a mullet. And then i remember when you fell at the dunes. I was so scared. And i sat at the picnic table with you while you tried to comprehend what just happened. You had sand all over your face and i used my towel to brush it off. While we sat there for the ambulance to come, you seemed embarrassed, but i was thankful that I was able to sit there with you. Because while I sat there with you, I knew that this year was not going to end up ok. And i wish i could turn back time so i could spend that ten minutes sitting with you again. And then i remember the last time I felt as if i said goodbye. After we sang The Awakening at last years senior rec concert, i was crying, because it was such a beautiful song. While you were kicking everyone off the stage to go drink choir punch in the cafeteria, i looked at you and gave you a huge hug and said "thank you for everything". I look back at that moment that sticks in my mind every day, because i think that was the one and only time i will ever say goodbye. It hurts me so much to know that i wont be able to make it to your memorial service. And it makes me angry to know that you wont be here with us as we carol this year. You were so great Mr. Green. And its going to be really hard for me to let go. You were the one teacher who treated everyone as an individual. And you let everyone know that they were special in some way. I feel as if i don't belong in the top choir at fremd, but i think you put me there for a reason. Because you believed in me, even though i wasn't the typical amazing choir singer. I will find that reason for you. And I promise that. But I thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to move forth. As i sit here and reflect upon my past four years with you, I realize that i was so blessed to have an angel such as you to have touched my life. I cant even find the right words to write. So i pray, that you are looking down on us from heaven and someday i'll be able to sing in your choir once again. I will try to grasp on to all of my experiences with you for my future, because if i do, i know i will be successful. You will live in me every day. Let music never die in me. Forever let my spirit sing, where all our voices join as one to praise the giver of the song. Awake awake. Let music live. let music live. 

Let Music Live. 

Days like today where everything is going wrong

And you just want to go home

But when you go home it's just nothing better. 

And Its never just one thing at a time... 

Life can mostly be stably alright

And then suddenly all at once

The magnet of all problems turns itself on. 

Everything is going wrong. 

I only wish there was a solution to make me feel better

But there is no golden answer

To cure all this sadness. 

Tell me something good, please. 

Dear Santa...

The Snakes & Suits Ampersand Blue Hoodie is SO cute and I need a new hoodie for this cold weather. Size wise- I'd like a medium or large. Cozy... mmm

The Muk Luks Women's Lace Back Boots are a favorite of mine because they are so cute and look really warm! and they are black and white so it can match a majority of my outfits. And these are affordable!

The Zuiko Digital ED 12-60mm lens for my Olympus camera. I would be a happy camper with this, because it would enhance my photography :)

This Crosley Archiver record player has built in speakers, and also has a CD player AND a casette player. AND a radio. This is expensive but its for a good cause!

******** I want these Minnetonka Fringe Boots desperately... they are muy expensive too. :( BUT IF I GOT THEM, I REALLY WOULD WEAR THEM EVERY DAY!

More to come

Soon you will be mine

Be Prepared to rock around the christmas tree with this baby! 

Drifting to Dream

And when I dream

I wont wake up

I need to see how this ends

Cause sometimes life is a little bit

Harder

To perfectly mend

But when I'm awake

I trust I can 

Take your hand

And see it clearly

This life was meant to be

Pace

I wonder if the world can run on a slow pace

because its risky taking the big leap

from imagination to reality. 

The biggest dilemma of our lives. 

Susannah

Why is it that this year, so much has happened? 2009  was an unforgettable year. which makes me scared for what's yet to come within this last month. 

To Susannah Kist-

I am praying for you. You were such a great woman. It is incredible how much I look back on all the classes I took from you, and how it helped form me transform into being the person I am today. The first biggest lesson I ever learned for the stage was from you. And I will never forget it. The way you taught, showed me that theatre is fun and all about what YOU as an actor put into it. Just look at how many stars you have trained! And your sweet and caring personality was just the most inspiring trait to learn from. I will never forget your smile and the way you loved all. Thank you for all you have done. God will keep you safe in his arms. 

the obstacle of my life.

I'm scared because I've never been in love before. 

All these years i've been holding back so heartbreak couldn't potentially be the death of me, 

as it once was before. 

But through all these years, you have been in the corner of my mind tangled up in the cobwebs along with memories that have been forgotten since their day. 

And now I'm left with a wide open door 

I am free to take chances

but I can't tell which side the light is shining through. 

Is it worth the risk to walk on the other side? 

because I'm too familiar with the mirages my mind has always made up.

And this is simply the obstacle of my life. 

God, please take my hand and show me what I've been so scared to do. 

Me and Taylor Swift have great minds that think alike. 

A few minutes ago I thought to myself, "Why cant you see that you belong with me." 

Crazy right? 

You're on the phone with your girlfriend, She's upset
She's going off about something that you said
She doesnt get your humour like I do

I'm in the room, its a typical Tuesday night
I'm listening to the kind of music she doesnt like
And she'll never know your story like I do

But she wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts
She's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers
Dreaming bout the day when you'll wake up and find
That what you're lookin for has been here the whole time

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you
Been here all along so why can't you see?
You belong with me
You belong with me

Where were you?

If I were to follow this advice

The truth is

I'd have no one. 

No matter how much you think I'm dumb for having legit feelings

And no matter how many times you think your perfect

And that "you do nothing wrong at all"

I still have feelings. Your actions speak louder than words..

Well I guess thats the only way possible to put it

Since you decided not to give me words. 

Sometime God can show you strange things

Such as seeing what you thought as your best friend

As your worst

And your worst friend

As your best

I

Am

Done.

Lean on me

When your not strong

I'll be your friend

Someone to carry on

(Which is what i gave to you)

For, It wont be long

Till I'm gonna need

Somebody to lean on. 

(Way to be there.)

I know you think I'm "OVERREACTING"

Because you think this happened just once

But I don't have as many fingers

to count all the times

Where I needed somebody to lean on.

Where were you?

I wonder how differently i would look if tried and worked out to look like a supermodel..... New goal possibly? :D 

Since I have no life now, and I got a new membership to the gym.. all I need is a car and then I believe it's possible. 

And my prize would be the look on your face. 

After a million rejections in one lifetime

Then you start to really begin to feel worthless

Especially if it's a rejection of your passion. 

And pretty much the only thing you think your good at. 

And building up a good reputation was just a waste.

Life Support.

It's just another hour

It's just another day

It's just another weekend

Where I waste my life away

It's my longest hour

It's my toughest day

And it's just this weekend

Where all I do is pray

Pray that your gonna be okay

You stopped my lifeless breath

and turned it into a true emotion

The pain that wants to turn back this clock

Just so I could've sifted my words into your life

I am living to know that you will be here another day

My eyes are open to every subtle shift

Help me grasp this life which left long ago

Because suddenly time turned into nothing but a word

Time turned into empty space

And I suddenly saw us sitting at our desks

Laughing from the good life. 

Sitting in our closet club

Sitting in that hallway as you let those burdened unspoken words

Unleash from your lips

And I felt God bring our hands together

So we could share our dreams and share our lives

Because we shared past pain

That would always leave that scar

I was your band-aid and you were my crutch

And in that one simple moment. 

In those simple hours

In those simple days

You saw yourself as beautiful.

I'm praying for you Matti

When Heaven's Light Shines...

It's times like these

Where I truly look over my 18 years of life. 

Conversations are taken for granted.

It is so important to keep in contact with the ones you love

Because you never know

One day

The world can randomly take a wide turn.

Sometimes there are distractions

And sometimes there are fights

But in the end none of that is worth it

Because the love you have for someone

Or even the love you once had for someone

Will always remain within you.

Even if you just met them twice

Or even if your relationship went separate ways

The impact of a young life leaving so early

The impact of a loved one leaving too early

Turns into a tree of thoughts

It makes me look at the world through renewed eyes

Rest in peace Liza Whitacre. I met you just twice, and both times I can distinctively remember the smile you had on your face. Especially at the cast party Lauren had for musical during Thoroughly Modern Millie. I remember going to Lauren the next day and telling her about how pretty and nice I thought you were. For some reason, your presence was strong and rememberable, and I will never forget it. 

It's called Hypocrisy.

If you could see this through my eyes

You would definitely agree...

As a matter of fact-- You did see it through your eyes

A short while back

And you took the same path

Except, my story was a little more sympathetic.

Yours was just pathetic. 

It's not about the end

It's not all about me --

But maybe if your reflection shows

You can see who you've turned to be.

Sometimes I wish something could blow down your brick wall...

The stronger you seem to stand

The more it distances us. 

I've really realized; To everyone I've always been just the crawl-back-to-friend when there is nothing for them to cling on to anymore... and I'm counting the days until it happens again. Its a ticking clock and I've memorized the script.

- I just thought you'd be the last person to take your bow. 

So my answer is... Yes you are free to be who you want to be. But you better not expect me to be sitting at the park bench day in and day out and then miraculously be there when you decide to take your lunch break.  If you even send a carrier pigeon once in a while, then That at least shows that you care just a little. And then life would be back in its place. I know your used to a crowd of fans, but thats not me anymore. Sometimes you have to give to get. So I'm stopping myself before my constant living nightmare happens again. You've heard me vent about all of my friends who have done the same thing to me... so what makes me want to stay to watch the show again? There is no stop sign to a change... so whenever you feel free to be that person you used to be... the whole titanic is waiting for you by the ticking clock in the lobby.  

I'm Just a penny.

Loosing a best friend;

It turns me inside out like a fever

And even when she's getting close

Not even one phone call

Not even one text

Im not the rock that I used to be.

I was dropped off from the tallest city scraper

Like a single unappreciated penny

And i fell with the rain.

Hey 2 4 6 8

I really do appreciate.

And I'm not a frickin cheerleader

Sometimes they need a little cheering up too. 

But like always

Appreciation

Its just another one sided story.

My dues are up 

And I'm no longer needed

There's the exit, and thank you for visiting.

I wonder what its like to be loved full time

Cause suddenly

The only person who matters is him.

It really is true that you forget the world around you.

Previously on lost

even he was an old friend.

Funny thing is

Through this windy situation

She was transformed as her own worst enemy.

Maybe thats why they were best friends in the first place. 

Just another sad so long

Every heart should be handled with care 

Cause your palm will gage with scars 

From every heart you've smashed with your bare hands. 

Soon enough you wont be able to handle your past mistakes

And your mind will rage with regret from your bad reputation

So why continue to kill the only good part of life you have?

Sometimes people can't change.

No matter how much you believe. 

11 thoughts

1.) "Into The Wild" was a great movie.

2.) I hate the fact I'm witnessing a game being played.

3.) I always seem to hate who I've started.

4.) Money won't buy you happiness.

5.) I was invisible. Now your invisible. 

6.) I'm starting to wonder which is better... Drama or the silent treatment? 

(With drama, ends always meet. The silent treatment leads to a blank)

7.) What would happen if i lived outside with no technology and tried to survive?

8.) Why do I always waste my time trying to make friends with douche bags?

9.) The music scene is a scam. 3/4 of musician's are selfish.

10.) I hate the fact that I am the unlucky one of the bunch so everyone can use me as an example of why they appreciate love. Because it doesn't come easy. 

and 11.) The funny thing is, you'd think this is about this one person, but behind these words is my real life and not the false thing that i wouldn't consider my life. 

Dear Diary,

I'm (silently) in love with a boy

Who's LOUDLY in love with a girl. 

Just FYI

I never put a period at the end of our sentence

Instead you put a dot dot dot and never finished your thoughts

You placed your pen down

And a new book looked much more interesting to read

So I sat and stared at the ticking clock... 

While you read of adventures in a different genre

Of Superheroes and Villains

Of Adventures and Home

Of Love and Hate

And I don't wait for anyone, ever

... So your times up

And I placed my pen down

It was you who finished our story

It was you who put the period at the end of our sentence. 

The End.

"Oh captain, my captain"

Oh, how badly i want to do a band photo shoot of this exact frame... 

If you haven't seen it, "Dead Poets Society" is a great movie. 

It's all about poetry and Robin Williams does an amazing job at his role as Mr. Keating. 

Also, I think it's funny that Red from "That 70's Show" is in it too. 

CARPE DIEM

Leave your Ego At the door please.

an open writing in process...

She's so Hott

She's so suave

Maybe she can hide 

that she's a cheap shot

Oh no oh no

i gave her an ego

Ay yi yi

I must've screwed up her life

Uh oh wauh oh

I told her she was super

I was just being... nice?

I'll never lie again

That i'll never lie again

cause egos 

are not my friend

They All Tell Me;

And mama told me,

even if you sing your heart out

you still cant always win.

And the world told me,

It's about your final phrase 

That choose the direction of your next step.

West east south and north

What is this even worth?

But its all about the passion

That keeps us moving for the life we can or can't take

Red or blue pill

The choice of my fate.

And maybe if I push this contagious smile

Then it can spread for miles.

I caught the sickness of an empty place inside

Once called a heart. 

This thing that wants to beat again

And wants to be bundled up in blankets 

around a blaze of passion. 

Cause philosophy told me the point of losing is winning.

And one day, I'm gonna sing my heart out

And I'm maybe gonna win

And mama

Oh, she'll be proud. 

The Mind Endeavors

And maybe you'll never know

There's a life inside this mind. 

I feel every step i take down the street

And i feel pain for the shoes that are too small.

Im a sucker for the luck i never win

But hey i still believe there's one day. someday.

and thats where i imagine things 

thing that could never happen on no occasion of this night.

And you'll never even appreciate that i appreciate you

Some say that i'm breaking all time

But time is all i've got to waste

Because maybe the dream is pleasure to reach

When this mind gets going

it never ever stops

So caution to you

the unknown character

my mind's little secret...

Like a bat out of hell

You charge through more than anyone cares to know

if only you'd notice the kind of life thats inside this mind.

timf

:(

My 3:30 AM thoughts

Honest lyrics are more than just words coming from the heart...

But Un-cliché words that you are not afraid to say. 

Some weird phrase that comes up in your mind

Something that has never been said before. 

The best part of believe is the lie

or would you rather hear a song that goes

i wanna feel you i wanna touch youuuuuuuuuu

i look at the sky and think of you. 

But sometimes there are rediculous lyrics that are just plain stupid like

Kiss me through the phoooneee

and thats all the song sings. And then some sexual annoying sounds that are tracked repeatedly afterwards. 

Honesty and originality is what makes a person stand out. 

But when you are honestly trying to hard to be original where it shows your desperate..

its embarrassing. 

Listening to musicians like

Regina Spektor

Fall Out Boy

Manchester orchestra

This is me smiling

Panic! at the disco...

I am starting to really like my variety of musicians i like.

Talent or Talentless... people work really hard on the music they make, and no matter what they throw passion at it... but i guess the successful ones are just the chosen ones who hit the nail on the head on peoples current day feelings towards their lives, that the lyrics and beats happen to make a connection with their current day lives.

now i don't even know what I'm typing out cause i am half asleep... but i had this conversation with some one earlier and i've been cursed with thinking on it all day. 

To you.

To you

Im just a number.

Im another face in the crowd.

A person you fake a friend

To be used for living needs.

Im just the extra conversation

On a Quiet lonely day

Im the dinner date 

only for your empty stomach

You'd expect id felt the same

And To look up and see your presence

Is for the phrase to keep

The experience to live off of

The experience to keep the money flowing

Through the hands of my peers

Im the snooze button whenever your buisy

And to you,

Im a fan. not a friend.

To me

Your a talented individual

Your a memory that reminds me of my great past

An example of flaws that fall into my category as perfect

One who leads the right way of living

Yet went down the wrong path

A person i view as a good friend

One who holds a good conversation

After a crazy day of life

A pure example of the one who acts caring

But has better things to do then risk time for friendships

Your words can stop me in my tracks 

Because what i give is care for a genuine pal

And to me,

You are a friend. Not a fan. 

If only you knew

What I knew. 

When does it start?

It sort of breaks my heart that i've never been in love. I know I'm only in high school, but i just want to experience a high school sweetheart. People say that its not that big of a deal, but it is. To have a friend to hang out with, and you look forward to just simply watching a movie. Or just lying outside looking up at the stars. Everyone i know who is in love is just happy. So what am i missing out on? Curiosity kills and I'm ready to finally start living my life sometime. But i hate the wait. So then what do i do? keep my pace on sitting around waiting for something to happen? because it really doesn't seem as opportunities are close to mine. I don't know how much longer this will take, but any longer i feel like it'll be the end of it for me. I really believe therefore ill just be alone for a while. 

This is a scene

I just had the best night of my summer

it all started out with a movie

That movie transformed into a night full of quoting hilarious lines

Those hilarious lines transformed into facebook status updates in tweets

and then dun dun dun

Ironically at the same time, there is a party that most likely was formed or advertised to shove it in peoples faces that they weren't in the clique of friends anymore.

and then that quote "operation: Im so there its insane!" ironically looked as a "Operation: IM GONNA CRASH YOUR PARTY"

Paranoia is a beast we like to play along with

Well we don't have energy, time, or effort to literally crash a party

but its pretty easy to tweet "If you washed your car today, it was a waste" 

And a funny thing is that I went to jewel with Jess to pick up bananas for my work, and she took a picture of the 5 bunches in my hands. 

ahaha funny thing, it matches with our bitch theme of the day

Pranks with bananas? never heard of it... But why else would you be holding a stack of bananas in your hand? 

mwahahahaha. 

Good thing Karmas a bitch and ended that party early anyways. 

And that early ended party turned into a night of bitch fights over twitter and aim.

I can feel the heat of the summer. 

And i'm loving every single bit of it

Because the truth is

All i had do do was do nothing to form such a crazy-filled-paranoia night. 

I am confident that I did absolutely nothing wrong. :D

all i can say is i love my family so much

and i love she's the man for starting this whole scene

Amazing Video...

http://vimeo.com/6000638

Check it. I love videos like this. 

Passion #1 (The Phantom Of The Opera)

Passion #1

The Phantom of the Opera is my number one comfort. I have been listening to it a lot this week. For some reason it is like my lullaby. It puts me into a calm mood after the worst has occurred. It made me remember the time in my life where I watched it every day. I guess I put fourth my passion into objects because I'm cursed at love.... well at least the phantom of the opera will never disappoint me. Ironically i wore my phantom shirt today. And i also own the phantom bracelet and the book. I think I might read it again someday. I even know all the lyrics to the songs . I've seen the broadway play, and that was one of my happy days. Another good memory that phantom brings me is walking out of choir down the long choir hallway with my old friend Erin. We would split the headphones and listen to the 13 minute song "Down Once More" and sing along theatrically to it. I even remember the first time i watched this movie.I was at my uncles apartment and I started watching it halfway through and i couldn't take my eyes off of it. One of my tattoo ideas (if i ever get a tattoo) is probably an art from from something of the movie. Possibly the rose with the black bow? who knows. :D

a walk to remember

How can a movie be so beautiful.

just watched a walk to remember. 

i love that movie.

it makes me cry. 

titanic too.

im not an emotional person in life

but movies for some reason really spark that trait in me. 

gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

future?

Part of me wants to hold on to my childhood

and also live life based on the simple works that make me happy

settle down slowly in nothing too fancy. and just live my youth freely while it lasts

But then the other part of me wants to set up my future to become a successful woman. 

this part of me knows ill keep myself living, but will i be happy in the major workplace? 

i cant decide.

and i have to figure this out soon. 

my college awaits...

askgalskarkjnajha

Figures, im really disappointed in you.

Dear Mrs. ______

The funny thing is,

your just like your mother. 

The way you talk, 

the way you dress,

The way you know what your doing is wrong

And it's a bad habit that keeps poisoning your life

But you do it anyway...

Your cries of self pity are all true

and you should keep crying until you grow up.

We have suffered as a family through the hardships in life,

but we don't repeat mistakes as much as you do. 

Go ahead and rake up people for your team.

You never even liked them anyway,

But its obvious now your desperate,

Our slap in your face made you a better person to them.

Well i'm glad you can be a better person with out us. 

Because we don't want you in our life.

You caused an earthquake that should have never shook. 

But our feet trembled and we grew far apart.

With my mind full of anger, all i can say is

That i'm glad this canyon is between us.

You'll just hear my echos a few miles away.

The echo you wished to see the birth of. 

I know you.

And i know your suffering. 

( Have fun listening to my echos of laughter. 

You'll never get it back. )

Sincerely, 

Me

(I never really liked you anyway.)

I like the way you call me late at night 

to vent about a stupid girl

I like the way the very next day

You have her in a twirl. 

Cause you a lie, a cheat, 

and I'm just beat from trusting.

From falling

From failing 

in your game. 

I swallowed your trust

from all that lust

towards words and unrevealed

secrets meant to stay untold

Now doubt is all i have to hold.

I never really liked you anyway

But for some silly odd reason i had to play

In your game of disguise and lies

i was stupid to believe your empty word. 

Because i already knew

Already knew

your a life long chum with a heavy guilty heart. 

Someone, Find The Cure.

I saw through my peripherals because I hate the fact I'm looking. 

But I love the fact that your there.

Just one look and my body's turning inside-out. 

These butterflies have the sharpest wings

And I can feel them creep with their gentile arms strolling.

The reality behind this beauty.

To look into the eye of the powerful being

Turns me petrified and cold to the touch.

Turns me to a mess with tapping fingers and fidgeting hands.

I pray you don't see the tears in my eyes.

Because they're not due to sadness

They're not due to happiness

They're due to this illness, this emotion unknown. 

There is no name for what I feel when I see you

It is not love, it is not hate, but a simple way of wishing

A simple way of knowing

Our paths went the wrong ways. 

We messed with justification. 

LYRICS- Ryan Cabrera

This segment of a song goes out to someone special to me. 

This song played while having a conversation that related to this, 

and I thought of you. <3

"I've waited all my life to cross this line 
to the only thing thats true
so I will not hide
i'ts time to try anything to be with you
all my life I've waited
this is true

you don't know
what you do
everytime you walk into the room
I'm afraid to move

I'm weak
it's true
I'm just scared to know the ending
do you see me too?
do you even know you meant me!"

- Ryan Cabrera

RIP Michael Jackson.

Talent, Grace, Dedication... A true legend died today. The moment i saw it on Tv, the world stopped. I have always thought of this day ever since i was young. I even remember bringing up the conversation to my dad a few weeks ago, "It will be so sad when Michael Jackson dies, because he is one of the biggest legends of our time." Although people view him as a negative figure in our american pop culture, they seem to be blind to the many positive things he brought to us. His talents in dancing, singing, and loving were always things that stuck out to me. People say, "You aren't allowed to be sad and post it all over twitter/facebook/blogspot (etc.) because you weren't even a FAN! And now all the sudden he dies and you've become his BIGGEST fan!" This to me is just vulgar. There are a lot of people that we respect in our time who made some kind of impression in your life such as a Michael Jackson song Binging moment to bring you a bit of happiness in your life. and Come on, i know you've tried doing the thriller dance at least ONCE in your life! But, No, i don't know much about his life or even all of his music at all. But what i do know, is that he showed his music genius side to the world with the courage of being himself, and being different. And that is one of the many things i idolize about him. The thing that makes me sad, is that these past few years of his life only went down hill. Starting with his race-transformation and constantly getting shit from it, to his nose jobs and plastic surgery, and then to the whole molesting little boys thing. These actions lead to many strong against michael. And to watch footage of him being flocked by haters and fans, sounds like a sucky life to me. I heard an interview from a family member who even said that he couldn't trust anyone other than his family, because everyone else has let him down by exposing his personal life. But even with all this negativity, he never quit because for a while he has been preparing for a large tour in london. That is something i would have loved to see. But unfortunately the people attending all of those + 50 sold out shows worth have to be let down. And it makes me so sad, that while he was finally making his comeback, his life ended.  But Michael will never die, he will live on forever with his songs and videos. 

VIEWMORE

AND THINK ABOUT THIS: this was all before auto-tune. 

A TRUE MUSICIAN! 

(that ones for you Tony Martino)